Thursday, November 4, 2010

Depression

I am struggling with depression, again.

I don't like the way that I am dealing with it. I actually told someone today that "I have a right to be defensive because people are assholes." Of course, it is a good quote... buuuuut not the type of person that I want to be.

It is a funny dichotomy, here I am trying to be a Christian and I have trouble tolerating the basic dealings that I have with people. Disappointing.

I think that it is bitterness, disguised, well... not sure what it is disguised as. Perhaps it is just bitterness.

I am having a really hard time forgiving people of long ago. I have been considering Emillie's disappearance and the catalysts for said disappearance. Not doing so well on the forgiveness front.

Calling a therapist about EMDR. Something has to change.